So it's been almost 6&1/2 months since I gave birth to Rowan and I am continually disappointed with things that I hear from other women.
Why do we as women insist on glorying in the pain of childbirth? Why are the most popular and re-told stories horror stories? Why do we seem to constantly try to one-up each other by having the most painful and/or horrific tales to tell? And why do we have to make sure we tell these stories to our pregnant friends or other women who haven't had kids yet?
I try not to do this. I also have a couple of friends who feel the same way. This is the most important, wonderful, crazy, awesome experience we can have as women (in my opinion). We know it's probably going to be painful. We know there are things that can go wrong and there are risks involved. But honestly, do we need to tell each other the very worst it can be all the time?
Instead of trying to one-up other women with how horrible your birth was compared to hers, let's congratulate those women who have relatively easy births. "Your labor was only 2 hours? That's fantastic! Good for you!" "You didn't use an epidural or any other drugs? Good for you!" Keep repeating that phrase: "Good for you!"
Let's encourage each other to do what's best for them. Just because my epidurals (yes, plural) didn't work, I don't tell my friends how horrible that was and demand that they don't try one. Every woman is different, every pregnancy is different and every baby is different. We can't all expect to have the same birthing experience. Like most things in my life, especially the medical ones, I like to make a joke out of it. We think it's pretty typical of my body to not respond to any of the painkillers they gave me. And kinda funny when you think of it like that.
Celebrate this most wonderful experience! Enjoy every moment, even the painful ones. That child will only be born once and you want to remember it as the perfect moment when that perfect creature truly became a part of your life, no matter how it really happens.
And besides, if it was really that bad, why'd you have the second one? Or third? Or sixth?
See, it's not that bad.
1 comment:
Ahhh, Bob, so good to hear you expound on the beauty of motherhood. Seems the need to share one's childbirth stories is an age old thing. Maybe even as old as the "oldest profession"...?? (har) Every Mom in the world has the advantage of sharing her birth experience as being a one and only thing that no one else has ever experienced. And the beauty of that? It's true - no one in the world has ever experienced what you have. Whether you care to share it or not, good or bad, is an individual thing. You & I have been blessed with "good" birth stories. Those who have not, still feel the need to share, maybe to appease their negative thoughts? or just plain share.....I think it's just a Mom thing (sorry to leave you out of the equation James).....but as long as Mom's share, there will always be 'birthin' stories' - Lawd, Scarlett, I don't know nuthin' bout birthin' babies!So, with all the information floating around out there......suffice to say, there will always be babies, and always be stories to tell, and always someone who wants to hear them. Enuff said. Gramma Robin
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